The Emperor’s New Book

A book filled with blank pages has become a surprise bestseller hit. The 200-page What Every Man Thinks About Apart From Sex is “written” by Oxford University graduate Sheridan Simove and has proved popular with students following heavy promotion in student unions across Britain.

The book costs £4.69 and is selling as a novelty notebook.

“I bought a copy for my mate as a joke and he started using it as a note pad for lectures,” says Nottingham Uni student, Jess Lloyd. “Now everyone seems to have one. It’s started a real craze on campus.”

Mr Simove expressed surprise at the success of his book.

“I never anticipated that my book would be used for students to take their lecture notes in,” he said.

“In a sense they are proving me wrong by filling my book with content. But I wonder how many of them go back to thinking about sex once the lecture is over. I’d be willing to bet that answer is 100%.

“After many years of hard work I finally realised that men think of absolutely nothing apart from sex. It was a shocking conclusion and I realised that the world needed to be informed of my findings.

“It is very gratifying to see my book outselling many other academic works whose authors claim to have worked even harder than I to break new ground and further the extent of human knowledge.

“I now intend to develop my research further and am planning a PhD at the university of life on the subject of what women think about apart from sex. I hope to publish my findings in another decade.”